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I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27.
- Clement Atlee
A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch.
- James Beard
Cucumber should be well sliced, dressed with pepper and vinegar, and then thrown
out.
- Samuel Johnson
The cook was a good cook as cooks go; and as cooks go, she went.?
- HH Munro
Eat at this restaurant and you'll never eat anywhere else again.
- Bob Philips
In Spain, attempting to obtain a chicken salad sandwich, you wind up with a dish
whose name, when you look it up in your Spanish-English dictionary, turns out to
mean: Eel with big abcess.?
- Dave Barry
Cursed is he who uses peanuts when the recipe calls for almonds.
- Christopher Driver
If a lump of soot falls into the soup and you cannot conveniently get it out,
stir it well in and it will give the soup a French taste.
- Jonathan Swift
'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'.
- Dave Barry
Personally, I stay away from natural foods. At my age, I need all the
preservatives I can get.
- George Burns
If this is tea, please bring me some coffee, but if this is coffee, please bring
me some tea.
- Abraham Lincoln
I'm at the age when food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact I've
just had a mirror put over my kitchen table.
- Rodney Dangerfield
The perfect lover is one who turns into pizza at 4am.
- Charles Pierce
I refuse to spend my life worrying about what I eat. There's no pleasure worth
foregoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward.
- John Mortimer
Americans will eat garbage provided you sprinkle it liberally with ketchup.
- Henry Miller
The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served
the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.
- Calvin Trillin
I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick, not wounded, dead.
- Woody Allen?
She did not so much cook food as assassinate food.
- Storm Jameson
Nouvelle Cuisine, roughly translated, means: I can't believe I paid ninety-six
dollars and I'm still hungry.
- Mike Kalin
Is Elizabeth Taylor fat? Her favorite food is seconds.
- Joan Rivers?
Never eat anything at one sitting that you can't lift.
- Miss Piggy
MacDonalds in Tokyo is a terrible revenge for Pearl Harbour.
- SI Hayakawa?
Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions
in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities
between the two but can't remember what they are.
- Matt Lauer
Coffee in England always tastes like a chemistry experiment.
- Agatha Christie
Tell the cook of this restaurant with my compliments that these are the very
worst sandwiches in the whole world, and that when I ask for a watercress
sandwich I do not mean a loaf with a field in the middle of it.
- Oscar Wilde
A winkle is just a bogey with a crash helmet on.
- Mick Miller
Hotel tea is when you have to mix together a plastic envelope containing too
much sugar, a small plastic pot of something which is not milk but has curdled
anyway, and a thin brown packet seemingly containing the ashes of a cremated
mole.
- Frank Muir
I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate
plants.
- AW Brown
The food tasted so bad the dog had to lick his ass to take the taste out of his
mouth.
I would feed this meal to the pigs but I don't want to offend them.
This food is not worth the scrapings off a pigs ass; which, I assume, is where
it came from.
The cook is an assassin! |
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