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An over-fat, flatulent, 62-year-old windbag. A master of
inconsequence masquerading as a guru.
- Richard Harris, on Michael Caine
In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.
- Rita Rudner
Can't act. Slightly bald. Can dance a little.
- Anonymous screen test, on Fred Astaire
I never said all actors are cattle; what I said was all actors should be treated
like cattle.
- Alfred Hitchcock
Christina Aguielra is one of the most disgusting human beings in the world.
- Kelly Osbourne
Everyone is going on about how great Julia was in Erin Brockovich, but what did
actually do? Wear push-up bras. It wasn't great acting.
- Eric Roberts, on his sister, Julia Roberts
Most of the time he sounds like he has a mouth full of toilet paper.
- Rex Reed, on Marlon Brando
In Hollywood, a starlet is the name for any woman under thirty who is not
actively employed in a brothel.
- Ben Hecht
If people don't sit at Chaplin's feet, he goes out and stands where they are
sitting.
- Herman J. Mankiewicz, on Charlie Chaplin
When Chaplin found a voice to say what was on his mind, he was like a child of
eight writing lyrics for Beethoven's Ninth.
- Billy Wilder, on Charlie Chaplin
A woman went to a plastic surgeon and asked him to make her like Bo Derek. He
gave her a lobotomy.
- Joan Rivers
Glenda Jackson has a face to launch a thousand dredgers.
- Jack deManio
He emits an air of overwhelming vanity combined with some unspecific nastiness,
like a black widow spider in heat. But nobody seems to notice. He could be
reciting 'Fox's Book of Martyrs' in Finnish and these people would be rolling
out of their seats.
- Roger Gellert, on John Cleese
Dramatic art in her opinion is knowing how to fill a sweater.
- Bette Davis, on Jayne Mansfield
The Russians love Brooke Shields because her eyebrows remind them of Leonid
Brezhnev.
- Robin Williams
She has discovered the secret of perpetual middle age.
- Oscar Levant on Zsa Zsa Gabor
Whatever happened to John Travolta? I heard he joined some cult and got fat. Or
he married and had a child. Which amounts to the same thing.
- Gerard Depardieu, on John Travolta
My dear chap! Good isn't the word!
- W. S. Gilbert, speaking to an actor after he had given a poor performance
Until Ace Ventura, no actor had considered talking through his ass.
- Jim Carrey
Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?
- Harry. M. Warner, founder of Warner Brothers, in 1927
Another dirty shirt tail actor from New York.
- Hedda Hopper, on James Dean
He played the King as though under momentary apprehension that someone else was
about to play the ace.
- Eugene Field, referring to Creston Clarke's performance in the role of King
Lear.
What makes him think a middle aged actor, who's played with a chimp, could have
a future in politics?
- Ronald Reagan, on Clint Eastwood's bid to be elected mayor of Carmel
A buxom milkmaid reminiscent of a cow wearing a girdle, and both have the same
amount of acting talent.
- Mr. Blackwell, on Brigitte Bardot |
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